My Chaos Partner…

I know I have behind lately with my posts. With school back in swing, sports and extra curricular activities, dealing with my wild child toddlers mischief and agreeing to go back to work substitute teaching for my former mother in law (yes, my ex husbands mother is my boss again) I have been a little busy. At the same time that is why this post is so necessary. 

Right now I am sitting at my son’s hockey practice after an already insane day. We have had 3 hours of archery, a hockey game, dealing with the tornado toddler and now practice, all to be right back at the rink for another game at 8:10 tomorrow morning. Mind you, I only have one child that plays hockey. This whole week has been insane and when I first looked at my calendar I was instantly overwhelmed as things kept getting added to it while I have been battling a bit of a cold. I have always been the mom who said “I got it!” as I start falling apart at the seams taking on more that I can handle but this time I actually turned to my husband and said “I need your help”. So that is what this post is about, my appreciation of my husband.

You see, my husband came into my life (again, we have know each other since our later teen years) during a very rocky time in my life. I was living with my parents, with my two older children and going through a very long and drawn out divorce. My forever husband had never really had much to do with kids so this was completely new territory for him. It was for me as well. I actually didn’t allow my children to even know about him until a year into dating and knowing he wasn’t going anywhere however that year (mainly 9 months of it) was the most challenging of my life. I had lost my place to live, I had to send my children to live with their father, I had no job, I hit my rock bottom thankfully with the cushioning, love and support of my forever husband. It was with that love and support I picked my self up off the ground, along with the help of some kickass roommates and friends. I don’t like to really talk about the emotional and hard part of those days and only the fond memories of how I got to where I am now but trust me, nothing I have been through is for the weak. I honestly don’t know if I hadn’t been born a fighter and had the support my forever husband gave if I would have made it out alive or as sane as I have. Maybe that can be a post for another day (I know my mother wants me to write a book) but this post is strictly about my husband who has throughout the years stood by my side when I need it, never questioned my decisions and has become one hell of a Step Dad. 

When my children met him Lilla was 7 and AJ was 3 going on 4. I remember that time so vividly. One week they were learning about Mommy’s boyfriend and the next they were staying at our new apartment and not having sleep overs with mommy at a family members house. There was a lot of learning that has gone on over the years. My forever husband had to learn that children always come first and to never ask me to choose because I would choose them every time. He thankfully never put me in that situation but it was very well known. It’s been amazing watching them grown together and figure out how this works. None of us knew what were doing but we were doing it. He has treated them like his own. Lilla has become “daddy’s princess”, he worked his butt off to pay for AJ’s hockey and billion other activities and we added our own little maniac. He bought us a house so all the kids had their own bedrooms and we would be closer to their school and their dad’s and he works so so so hard to make sure I have a life letting me be the best mom I can be. Now he’s helping be the teammate I need so I don’t run myself completely ragged. From being by my side at school orientations, to coming home from work early so I can be at hockey practice, to filling in for me at cub scouts because I can’t be in two places at once, to forcing me to take a break and bringing me home much needed soup when I am sick, to watching the tornado toddler and missing seeing games, to being so understanding as to why I have only been home about 1 night this week.

My husband entered a world of chaos not knowing exactly what he was getting himself into but now we are here, embracing the chaos together…

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